It’s very rare that you find a man playing the role of the “house spouse.” The role of homemaker is usually associated with the wife. For most men, being a house husband can be rough on the ego and quite emasculating.
And for women, explaining this arrangement to their girls can be embarrassing – especially if they’re the judgemental type.
But doing what’s best for you and your family may go against traditional gender roles, and gender-biasing may have to go out the window when considering the benefits of having your husband literally be the “man of the house”.
As women continue to join the workforce, the number of stay-at-home husbands continues to grow… and for good reasons. Here are a few benefits to having your man rule the house, while you’re out ruling the world! Just read it, even if you do not agree.
Greater paternal bond One of the main reasons a man will decide to stay at home is because of children. While the bond between a mother and child is usually immediate and considered the primary relationship, a house husband who is also a father will have an opportunity to stay home with their children and play more than just a supportive or secondary role in their children’s lives.
The bond between father and child is equally important and absolutely necessary for the emotional and social development of the child. Good fathers, who are present at home, bring just as much emotional balance and security to their children’s lives as the mother does, and gives them a better understanding of the full role of parenting.
While some men feel that parenting is women’s work, many full-time working fathers secretly wish they could stay home more to spend quality time with their children.
House husbands not only get to experience their baby’s important milestones, but they will also build a closer relationship with their children and bond with them a lot more than fathers who are absent because they simply work too much.
Less worry for the parents When both parents work outside the home, the demands of their job mean that a babysitter, a nanny or some other form of childcare is needed. Choosing a nanny or a daycare is nerve-racking, and no one really wants a stranger raising their child.
If it makes sense for the mother to continue working because of her higher salary, her benefits, or conflicting work schedules, then deciding that the husband stays home means that their child is being raised by someone he or she knows and trusts, and who shares the same family values.
If his job doesn’t require his physical presence, then it’s a win-win situation – adding income while serving as the primary caregiver. This alleviates the stress of worrying that the child is being well taken care of, and the working parent can focus on work, not what’s going on at daycare.
Saves money One of the other major reasons one spouse decides to stay at home is for economic reasons. The cost of childcare is astronomical these days, so much so that one parent’s income usually simply covers the cost of daycare alone.
Add to that, the cost of commuting, lunches, and so on and all that extra money going out could be saved simply by the husband staying or working from home. Working from home, or telecommuting, could cut expenses significantly, saving on gas, tolls and/or parking.
If you can save on daycare costs as well, that’s even more money in the bank. So if the wife must be physically present at her job, earns more than her counterpart, has better benefits and works closer to home, then daddy working from home, even if it’s part-time, is okay.
He understands what it means to run a household Most women who work full-time must also come home and take care of the home, whether that includes children or not. Some men feel that cooking and cleaning are a woman’s responsibility, even if she’s put in a 40-hour work week, and most don’t give their wives the support they need to balance it all.
After all, what’s so hard about washing a few dishes, doing some laundry and changing a diaper? Men who have worked the majority of their lives believe that it’s their job to bring home the bacon while their wives fry it up, and may not realise how difficult it is to actually maintain a household.
But with a tough economy and job loss hitting home, a man who finds himself suddenly unemployed, who is now a house husband will quickly come to appreciate all the hard work that their wives put into running the house before it became their responsibility.
You have a support system If you’re not a traditional feminist and he’s not a caveman, this can work, because you are two highly evolved people who don’t care what society thinks about gender roles.
A man who’s willing to cook, clean, and take care of the house and his wife is considered a God-send by most women who love coming home to a spotless home and a delicious meal waiting for them. Let’s face it, not all women are domestic divas who make great homemakers or stay-at-home mothers.
Some men are simply better at running things at home than women are, while some women flourish at work and want to have fulfilling careers. If you can accept this about yourself, having a house hubby, who loves and supports you, might be just the thing you need to help you be a super-star at work and achieve your goals as a team.
Being a house spouse is usually a thankless job that doesn’t pay in the way of money, but the rewards of an appreciative wife make all the hard work worth it.