My wife had an affair with her old boyfriend – can I still trust her?

My wife had an affair with her old boyfriend – can I still trust her?

My wife lied and lied about what had happened with an old boyfriend from her  schooldays. In the end it was her lover’s wife who told me it was a  full-blown affair.

I’m 48 and my wife’s 46. We’ve just celebrated our silver wedding anniversary  and had booked to go away for a week. The day before we were due to leave my  wife rang me at work in tears. She said I needed to come home but didn’t say  why.

I rushed home and she told me someone had put something on Facebook saying  she’d had an affair. She said it wasn’t true but when I asked her if she’d  been seeing someone, she said she’d met a guy for dinner.

He was an ex-boyfriend from years ago. She said they’d only had dinner,  nothing more. She said she’d never do anything to hurt me or the kids – we’ve two teenage girls. We went on holiday that night and had a good time  until the last night.

I couldn’t sleep. I kept wondering whether she was telling me the truth. The  next morning I asked her if she’d slept with this guy and she admitted she  had but just the once. I broke down in tears.

My wife received a text from her ex’s wife as soon as we got back home. She  wanted to speak to my wife but my wife said she couldn’t face it so I rang  her. She told me they’d been having an affair for six months starting last  October and asked that my wife leave her husband alone.

My wife still tried to deny it at first but I cried and pleaded with her to  be honest. We’ve talked, argued and cried but I still find it hard because  I’m sure she hasn’t told me everything. She started going out “with a  girlfriend” on Wednesday nights more than a year ago and that is when I now  know she accepted this guy on Facebook.

I am heartbroken. It’s put a huge strain on our marriage.

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