My wife had sex with another guy and the thought turns my stomach – yet I deserve it because I cheated on her first.
I’m 39 and she is 37. We’ve been together 17 years and we have two kids of 13 and 11.
My wife and I had a great relationship, never falling out and we had a good sex life. Then an ex-girlfriend popped up on Facebook. I hadn’t seen her for over 20 years.
Our flirting got more intense and then we met up – and there was an instant attraction between us.
She’s a single woman, also 39. She’d not lost her looks and at that moment, everything I felt for my wife was turned off. I wanted to be with this other person at any cost.
We started meeting up for sex and I was blinded with infatuation for her.
I left my wife last year – she didn’t know about the other woman. I just said I’d fallen out of love with her. I went back home two weeks later and was shocked to see her. She looked terrible, she’d lost so much weight.
I stayed another month, then left again when I couldn’t resist the pull to my lover. I left four times in eight months. I know how bad that sounds.
I’m back at home now and determined to make my marriage work. We’re stronger now. We don’t take each other for granted, we text saying how much we love each other.
I found out my wife had been with a guy one of the times we were separated just before Christmas. I’m heartbroken. I brought all this on myself I know - but I can’t get what she did with this other guy out of my head.
I tried to talk to my wife about it but she said, “It’s none of your business. We were apart. End of story.”
I know it’s my own fault but I feel so betrayed.