Ask Naij:

Ask Naij: "I Caught My Cousin In Bed With My Wife"

I dated my former girlfriend for six years. From the very first day I met her at a party organized for Jambites, I fell in love with her.

She was different from all the girls I have ever met. I convinced her to date me and that was how we started. I loved her with every fiber of my body. I actually deflowered her and she had become known to everybody in my family. I graduated before her. I was two years ahead of her.

Trouble started when she went to serve in Kano. She met my cousin there and through him I got to know she was having an affair with a commissioner in the State. I was so disappointed, I didn’t bother to give her a chance to explain or deny the allegations. I sent her an SMS, not to bother coming to my house again. I changed the lock just to make she doesn’t gain entrance into the house. When my parents got to know what happened, they pleaded with me to hear her out. I forbade them from ever discussing her with me.

My eldest sister in London also advised me not to listen to that particular cousin because of his antecedence. I also turned down her counsel. Even when I was told she was carrying my baby, I denied responsibility. There was nothing my parents didn’t say but I maintained my stance. I didn’t know what happened to her after the day she came to my office and I disgraced her.

Through the same cousin, I met and married my current wife within a year of leaving my ex. My father prevented us from going beyond the traditional wedding. He kept giving one excuse or the other to prevent us from going to the registry or church. Thank God I listened to him on that because my so called wife, I caught in bed with my cousin who later confessed that jealousy made him to frame my ex who he tried to date.

I later discovered that with the help of my parents, my ex and our son, relocated to England to stay with my eldest sister for a while before she got her own apartment. The problem is, she is refusing to have anything to do with me and my wife is refusing also to let go of me pointing at me as being responsible for the pregnancy she claims she has.

Please help me resolve this mess I am in. There is no way I can accept the pregnancy of a woman I caught in bed with another man. And I don’t know what to do to make my ex and child come back to me.

The worst thing is that none of my family members appears interested in helping me to talk to her. My parents in particular say since I refused to listen to them at the beginning of this problem, I should find how to make her listen to me and resolve the issue of my cousin and wife. My parents can be very difficult when they choose to be.

Please help me.

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