In any marriage setting, one of the things that gets a man excited and makes him feel like a real man is when his wife is all over him for sex.
It makes a man feel like a real man; a champion. But when the reverse is the case, he feels unfulfilled.
In reality, most men don’t get to the point where their wives practically and eagerly want to have sex with them. Rather, it is always the opposite; having to plead, pressurize, pamper, get moody, fight their wives for something that normally is for their mutual enjoyment. In worse cases, the resolve may be to rape her in order to have his sexual need fulfilled.
This is so because a large percentage of men have not discovered the secret of making a woman beg for sex. When a man discovers that secret, his wife, who seems uninterested in sex, will be practically seeking for opportunities to have sex with him.
This could range from cuddling him, giving him his favourite meals regularly, being ever ready to relieve his pains, taking pressures of life off him, sharing his burden and doing everything possible to keep him healthy. Really, there is no end to the sacrifices a wife can make to get her man to have sex with him. A woman will do all that for sex because her husband has discovered the secret I am about to share with you.
So, what should be done by a man to make his wife reach the point of seizing every opportunity to have sex with him? Before I share that secret with you, let me point out one major mistake that men, whose wives are not eager for sex, always make. That mistake is not approaching sex from the woman's angle. That is, they don’t speak the sex language of a woman, which is completely at variance with that of a man.
What most men do when they want sex from their wives is to communicate their desire for sex either verbally by saying, “Can I have sex with you now?” or better still, “can we have sex?” Or they may act out their desire by physically grabbing their breasts or bum. “What is wrong with this sex language,” you may want to ask? This approach does not flow with the sex language of a woman and that is why a wife may not be eager to have sex with her husband, despite the fact that it is the proper, exciting, and enjoyable thing to do. Please, don’t tell me you used this approach before and it worked. It worked at that point in time because you unknowingly spoke her language ahead of time. Or at best, she was physiologically turned on before making such moves towards her. That is why the average result you have in getting her to have sex has been frustrating.
What is the sex language of a woman? It is the “turn on, warm up and cooking process”. Every woman has a natural desire for sex, which lies low within her unless it is aroused through the process of warming up, as in the case of a car before driving off in it. If this process of warming up is skipped when it comes to sex, she feels abused, and as such becomes scared to have sex with him the next time. That is why she feigns body pains, headaches, stomach upset to say the least. When this is the case, “Oliver Twist asks for more” does not apply to her.
I believe Oliver Twist asked for more because he enjoyed the first meal he got. A research in church growth has proven that a second time visitor to a church is often a potential member of that church. Does this convey what I mean to you in a better form? So, for a woman to become eager for sex with her husband, he must constantly take her through the process of warming up to turn her on for great, exciting sexual experience. If in doubt, try driving off in your car without first warming it, and let me know the reaction you get from the car, compared to when you pass it through the warming process.
The cooking process is to metaphorically see it in the light of the process of cooking food. This process, as explained by Jack Grave, a female sex guru, is one which everyone who is hungry goes through for the food to be ready, except you want to eat raw food, which is unimaginable.
According to Jack Grave, ‘”most guys, especially those in longer-term relationships, miss out this point. They want sex so they expect it immediately. And if they don’t get it, they blame their partner. But doing this is just plain dumb.”
What Jack is saying is that when a man wants to have sex immediately with a woman outside her sex language of warming up to turn her on, it is like wanting to eat uncooked meal because one is hungry. But we all know that to do this is simply stupid. And this is exactly how stupid it is to want to sleep with your wife when she is not turned on. Now the point here is that if you want to eat, you have to be patient and wait for it to be cooked first.
Everyone wholeheartedly accepts this food cooking process as necessary. But when it comes to sex, most men don’t accept that this cooking process is necessary. They get frustrated or out rightly ignore the fact that they have to spend a little time warming their wives up first before they will eagerly want sex.
It is this warming up process that most men don’t want to appreciate. Thus, they keep complaining about the fact that their wives don’t like sex or are eager for sex. When the cooking process or warming up process is absent, the food is not good for eating. Thus sex becomes unattractive to a wife, making her to play hide and seek, while the husband keeps wondering if he married the wrong woman.
How do you get your wife to become eager for sex?This is to say how you can warm up your wife for sex before the real act. The process of getting your wife warmed up involves working on her emotions. Almost all women are highly emotional and respond almost according to her emotional workup. To get a woman to do unimaginable things becomes easier when her emotional buttons are touched. She will be grinning from ear to ear as if that is all about life.
So, a man who consistently batters his wife’s emotions should not expect her to be turned on to have sex with him. A woman under constant harassment from her husband does not naturally want to have sex with him. Rather, she wants to keep to herself and, if need be, get a shoulder to cry upon elsewhere. So, you need to examine how you talk to your woman, how you respond to her requests, how she is presented before your colleagues, friends and family members. Do you pull her down or make her feel worthless? Or do you celebrate her when you are in company of others?
Do you leave home in the morning without caring a bit what her day is like till you return home in the night, ready for two things usually, food and sex? Do you carry something that she is aware reminds you of her all day with you in the car or on your table in the office, or in your wallet? Do you verbalise your love for her, or you assume she ought to know that you really love and care for her? Do you look at her after dressing up for an occasion and tell her how beautiful she is? Things like these go a long way in affecting the emotional aspect of a woman.
So, if you want to start getting more sex from your wife, start to do what is necessary to speak her sex language - turning your lover on and stimulating her emotionally. Not only that, start enjoying the process of doing these - giving her massage, sending her messages during the day, finding new romantic songs you can have sex with. Do this and you will soon have more passion and sex in your marriage than you ever thought would have been possible.